I see that Prince Abdul-Rahman bin Abdulaziz al Saud died the other day. If you're having trouble keeping track of your Saudi princes, well, I don't blame you. Unlike the closely held princely titles of the House of Windsor, the House of Saud is somewhat promiscuous with the designation: there are (at the time of writing) over 10,000 Saudi "princes" running around the country - and, in fact, at this time of year, more likely running around Mayfair and the French Riviera, exhausting the poor old blondes from the escort agencies. I believe that's Abdul-Rahman at right, although to be honest all Saudi princes look alike to me, except that some wear white and others look very fetching in gingham. As I once remarked to Sheikh Ghazi al-Ghosaibi, the late cabinet minister, he was the only Saudi I knew who wasn't a prince.
Abdul-Rahman was a longtime Deputy Defense Minister, whose catering company, by happy coincidence, held the catering contract for the Defense Ministry. The first Saudi prince to be educated in the west, he was a bit of a cranky curmudgeon in later years, mainly because of changes to the Saudi succession that eliminated any possibility of him taking the throne. But he nevertheless held a privileged place as the son of Ibn Saud, the man who founded the "nation" and stapled his name to it. When I say "the son", I mean a son: Ibn Saud had approximately 100 kids, the first born in 1900, the last over half-a-century later, in 1952, a few months before ol' Poppa Saud traded in siring for expiring.
Abdul-Rahman's mother was said to be Ibn Saud's favorite among his 22 wives - or, at any rate, one of the favorites. Top Five certainly. She also had the highest status, because she bore him more boys - seven - than any other other missus. They're known as the Sudairi Seven or, alternatively, the Magnificent Seven. She also gave him seven daughters. They're known as the seven blackout curtains standing over in the corner. This splendidly fertile lady's name was Hussa bint Ahmed, and she was Ibn Saud's cousin once removed and then, if I'm counting correctly, his eighth wife. But she's a bit like the Grover Cleveland of the House of Saud - in that he's counted as the 22nd and 24th President of the United States, and she's the eighth wife and also either the tenth or eleventh. He first married her when he was 38 and she was 13. But he divorced her and then remarried her. In between their marriages she was married to his brother, but Ibn Saud was a sentimental lad and never got over his child-bride-turned-sister-in-law, so he ordered his brother to divorce her.
Don't worry, though: In the House of Saud, it's happy endings all round. Two of their daughters wound up marrying two of the sons of another brother of Ibn Saud. The Saudi version of Genealogy.com must be a hoot: "Hey, thanks for the DNA sample. You're 53.8 per cent first cousin, and 46.2 per cent uncle."
Anyway, all this Saudomy reminded me that on The Mark Steyn Show back in January I offered a few thoughts on Ibn Saud's establishment of his alleged kingdom. This is the first time this has been aired in the wider world, so give it a click and see what you think:
~Tomorrow, Wednesday, I'll be back on screen with Tucker Carlson, coast to coast on Fox News at 8pm Eastern/5pm Pacific. Before that, I'll be on the radio, with John Oakley on AM640 in Toronto, live at 5pm Eastern. Hope you can join me.
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Oh, and Ibn Saud's fecund loins remind me that, by way of stark contrast, we're taking your questions on the biggest issue of our time - the west's demographic death-spiral - in preparation for our next Clubland Q&A. If you're a Steyn Club member, please log in and pose your question in the comment section here.
If you'd rather weigh in on the malign Saudi state, feel free to be as Saudiphobic as you wish in the comments below.
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23 Member Comments
"They're known as the seven blackout curtains standing over in the corner." I'll never be able to look at the ladies in black at the local supermarket again without smiling.
How is it that ,for more years than I care to remember, our past leaders have "bowed" and "kowtowed" to these dubious Saudis that have unabashedly continued funding (i.e 9/11) terrorists to bring harm to our country ? Why can't we produce the oil from our "unlimited" resources here in the US (Denali untapped!) and tell these devious bastards to go fornicate with goats and camels as they seem to prefer over their women. I'm just sayin' !!
Another hilarious gem helping us face a world that seems on the brink of total insanity. Mark, I shall never, ever see an Arab, Saudi or otherwise, wearing their headgear and not think of your comment "to be honest all Saudi princes look alike to me, except that some wear white and others look very fetching in gingham." You certainly have a way with words :-).
As always, brilliant acumen and pure comic genius from Mark! Love the quotation marks around "princes" and "nation." My brain couldn't help but include additional marks around "married" and "throne." It also couldn't be prevented from imagining a photo caption: "Ethicus of Gigantopithecus." Guess that makes me a Saudiphobe! Or better yet, a Saudiloathe.... Thank you for providing us with your knowledge and personal insight into this "kingdom" (nobody else seems to be doing so) and for reminding us that the West is mainly responsible for the support of these monstrously evil regimes. Why the horrific enslavement of women and girls in Muslim nations doesn't seem to unite the West into their utter repudiation seems very.....suspect.
Hi Mark, Many thanks for this brief biopic of the House of Saud.Could you do a part 2 please? I would like to know a bit more of the back story regarding US involvement from the Kingdom's inception and why the US meekly accepted King Saud's demand to "leave their faith alone". Supposing the US had insisted,as a pre-condition to exploiting Saudi oil,that they be allowed to practice their faith in his Kingdom? And if he refused to countenace filthy infidel crusaders worshipping false God's on Islamic soil,then the deal was off. Could this have been possible? If the US hadn't been given the prerogative to exploit Saudi oil, would the Saudi's have gone to another country instead? Britain? Russia maybe? And why does the US and other Western powers still "submit" to Saudi Arabia today,even after 9/11 and the obvious funding of global terrorism? Why is it,that the most powerful nation on the planet,feels it must prostrate itself before a bunch of rag tag antediluvian Bedouins? Would be so good to hear your views on these questions. Many thanks and kind regards from Australian shores-John CK
I could not help smiling at "saudomized", but alas it's so true. I feel Europe is lost. They may try and fight back, but by then it will be to late. as to North America, I think we still might have a chance. as I said in an earlier post, I'm to old, and I'm a Brit, living in western Canada for 35 years! There is nowhere else for us to go, so, I'll stay here, and fight if I must, sigh!
with apologies... Who put the Saud in the Saudi A-rab-i-a? Who put the ram in the rama-dama-ding-dan Who was that man, I'd like to shake his hand He made my babies fall in love with me!
Full marks!
If we're brainstorming non-Prince Saudis, may I suggest Sheik Yerbouti, the only man in Saudi Arabia actively looking for a Jewish Princess?
Mark, you know you've just blown your last chance at an ambassadorship. Keep up the good work.
OMG HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
What with all we have to go through just to get on a plane these days, I think we are the ones getting Saudomized.
Mark, why is Merkel letting them all in? She said yesterday she would impose no limits. And there is little or no vetting. She is reported to have said that Germany will become Islamic, get used to it. In a sense she will be making Germany the most important and most powerful country in the Islamic world. In her thinking does she foresee that Germany could take command of the Islamic world with a German caliph -- for good or ill?
I think everybody in the free world should read this. Just to get a sense of how things are the Muslim country of Saudi Arabia. I'm not sure people understand the reality of it. These Saudi "Princes" are absolute pigs.
Mark: As a freshman at the American University of Beirut (1955-56), I remember long caravans of Saudi princes in new Cadillacs, not riding on old camels, streaming into Beirut to partake of the steaming brothels and alcohol-saturated nightlife in the cool Mediterranean night. Perhaps, I am speaking out of line, but as I recall, Americans who worked for Aramco were as sufficiently submissive as were and are the politicians in Washington. Not to promote a conspiracy theory (there may be good reasons back of it), but weren't Saudi citizens allowed to leave after 911 without being interviewed?
Leave? They were flown out by Bush. Not citizens, but the royals who were in the country. All done hush hush and very quickly.
Why oh why did the good Lord give them oil? It's enough to make you support some bloated unprofitable federal electric car disaster. If it weren't for petroleum these Saudi princes would be hoping for a two share of the sand to glass business
In re: Grover Cleveland, one of the Republican chants while the former mayor of Buffalo, NY was running for president was "Ma Ma where's my Pa. Run to the White House hahaha" Bill Clinton was not our first president with a questionable moral fiber.
Benjamin Harrison's major claim to fame is that he was the only President surrounded by Grover Cleveland!
Benjamin Harrison's major claim to fame is that he was the only President surrounded by Grover Cleveland!
I wanted to say something serious, but Saudi Arabia is such a malignant blight on the world, I couldn't think of a way to say anything without swearing.
Larry, you are so right: "Saudi Arabia is such a malignant blight on the world' as well as in bringing up their depravity and inbreeding - but we have to acknowledge that these guys figured out how to mess up the rest of the world, especially the WEST. Financing all those Mosques all over the place and communities either welcomed them or ignored them, thus installing 'headquarters' of terrorist training in large and small towns all across the USA, Canada and Europe.
Considering the rampant interbreeding among the House of Saud, I suppose they're lucky to be as rich as they are and can afford armies of servants, otherwise they might run into difficulties with ordinary tasks like tying shoes and remembering which hand to pick up the spoon with. It could explain the lack of imagination in naming their children: It seems like the names Mohammed, Abdul, Ali, or Hussein account for about 95 percent of Saudis, with an occasional Fahd or Salman thrown in for variety. The most they do is change the spelling; there are probably twenty or thirty variants of Mohammed. It reminds me of Will Cuppy's chapter on Hannibal in his "The Decline and Fall of Practically Everybody" in that he points out that Hannibal was a common name in Carthage -- that almost every family had at least one or two, along with Hasdrubals and Hamilcars. He went on to say he had no idea how they would have named Pullman cars. The last remark is probably lost on people today: at its height the Pullman Company operated 10,000 cars, and most of them were named. Robert Benchley once worried that a friend might give him an old sleeping car named "Angostura" or "Gleeber's Falls" and he would have to find a place to put it. Well, like the Carthaginians, I don't know what the Saudis would do if they had to name a fleet of Pullmans, either.