Programming note: At 8pm Eastern/5pm Pacific today, Monday, I'll be joining Tucker Carlson live across America. Hope you'll tune in!
I had the honour of hosting Friday's show, which isn't bad for a foreigner who can't even spell "honor". But it came out pretty well for us. We were not only the Number Two show in cable news, but the Number Two show in all cable, just a smidgeonette behind Sean Hannity - with twice as many viewers as MSNBC's Chris Hayes and thrice as many as CNN's Anderson Cooper, and 600,000 more viewers than the two of them combined. Which goes to a point I made on the radio, about the Democrats' enervated base.
Earlier today, I was back behind the Golden EIB Microphone for three hours of substitute-host-level Excellence In Broadcasting on America's Number One radio show starting at 12 noon Eastern/9am Pacific. You can find a few moments from the show here. George Soros' pajama boys at Media Matters didn't care for the cut of my opening jib:
MARK STEYN (GUEST HOST): We have breaking news. Cory Booker has suspended his presidential campaign. So he's gone. There are now no — I believe there are now no people of color left in the Democrat primary except Andrew Yang. And he's Asian — so as we know from recent court decisions, that doesn't count. So there are now no persons of color left on the — the Democrat primary is like one of these cheapo horror movies where all the black and minority actors get killed off first, leaving onstage the same tired old white people. Mostly septuagenarian white men, although I believe Elizabeth Warren — oh yeah, she's still in, she's of course officially a person of color in that she was Harvard Law School's first woman of color. So she's — suck it up, minorities! This is what happens when you mortgage your future to the Democrat Party!
The great repository of diversity now is Elizabeth Warren! The first woman of color. We know she's, what is she, 1/1,054th of color? Actually, do we know she's a woman? I mean, who's to say that's not all a big scam, too? And it's just going to be a bunch of septuagenarian white guys up there, along with Mayor Pete. Do we, are we really sure he's gay? I mean, he looks like some guy from the accountancy department. He doesn't — that's a very non-gay look. I don't know.
Anyway, the whole thing is the diversity of the Democrat primary has completely vanished, now. Cory Booker is out. I love it, it's this, just like big Xtreme Geezer Showdown. It's Dancing with the Coots. That's basically what the Democrat primary has boiled down to.
As I've noted before, Mr Soros's snowflake stenographers lack the critical-thinking skills to explain exactly why what you say is objectionable, so they just type it out in hopes that their audience will take the appropriate umbrage. The first commenter, "Woody Guthrie's Ghost", does his best:
Why is it that right-wingers seem to fantasize a lot about butt pleasure and other types of g. a. y. sex? Like this guy fantasizing about a trans version of Liz Warren.
Makes you wonder.
To which "Mr Rogers" replies:
Seems you are the one that is really fantasizing about it.
Indeed. To the delight of the Soros pajama boys, I'll be back in for Rush tomorrow, Tuesday.
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See you on the telly with Tucker.
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26 Member Comments
When are you Brits going to stop putting an unnecessary "u" into words?!
I had a good laugh over "Dancing with the coots" as I become one this year by turning 70. I'd say that I'm entering my 7th decade but I'm so confused by your critics who chastise you for not being correct when it comes to what century we're in that I don't dare go there....
It's simple Janet, your 7th decade is over and you're entering your 8th decade. When you turned 1, your first year was over and you were entering your 2nd year. When you turned 20, your second decade was over. And so on. I don't mean to be mean here. My 7th decade will be over real soon, too.
Happy Birthday, btw!
Janet, you know that 70 is the new 50, right? My father-in-law turns 107 this year. He's living in Delaware and a veteran of WWII. Nobody running for President has come to visit him yet. (I think the sons decided to keep it that way). He has a glass of red wine with his dinner every night, he has never exercised a day in his life and his sense of humor is still intact. His motto is the age-old one: all things in moderation. He also used to bake the best French bread in the family. You've got many years ahead of you to live it up, I'm sure.
Yipes, it's worse than I thought...my 8th (!) decade. Thanks for clearing that up, Steve (I think)
Thanks, Fran. There are things that one can do, or not do throughout their life that will increase their chances of illness but it seems to all come down to DNA and random chance. I am a cancer survivor and have no way of knowing if that will continue except to keep doing what I'm doing, being proactive and enjoying every day. Living to 100 is probably not in the cards, but that's okay with me. Mark keeps laughter in my life!
Good to get to know another cancer survivor, Janet. I survived breast cancer (6/'92) and then melanoma (12/'16) which I remember like yesterday because it was just around Mark Steyn's first internet transmitted Christmas Show. I remember thinking this was the cancer I wouldn't be so lucky to beat. Then I saw that Christmas show and wondered how did I miss all of Mark Steyn's many talents my entire life? That Christmas Show told me to hang on, there might be more living to do. Every day now counts as a gift. Anyway, living to a ripe old age isn't really a picnic.
I really have no desire to live that long, but I'd settle for another decade and a half. I had colon cancer, stage 2 fortunately and no follow-up except more frequent colonoscopies and a CT/blood work every 6 mos. All tests keep coming back fine. I can't encourage people enough to stop putting off that colonoscopy. Yes, it's not the most pleasant thing to do, but postponing it for years can lead to a different diagnosis than I was lucky enough to have.
Me neither, because it's one thing to be healthy and self-reliant as we age but it's not so great when we have to lean on the grown children for everything. I remember Tony Snow who was one of my personal favorites who would guest host for Rush in the nineties. Just like when Mark sits in for Rush, it was a nice treat to listen in. It was very upsetting when he succumbed to that dreadful cancer. He was at least ten or fifteen years younger than me. Cancer doesn't care about its victims' age. You give very valuable advice, Janet.
You're welcome, Janet. And you should thank me. Thanks to me, you have gained a whole decade, a whole decade of living, loving, laughing; a whole decade of acquiring wisdom and understanding, of appreciating the beauty all around you -- all thanks to me.
You know, I am humbled by how great I am.
I confess I love that there are still pajama-clad Zacharys and Jeremiahs transcribing your every word, dizzy over its self-incriminating -isms, -ists, and -phobias. (Or were they Jeremys and Zachariahs?) What stage of snowflake development is a Media Matters transcriber, anyway? Pajama Boy First Class? Or has one been promoted to Staff Sweat Pants and Bathrobe? And is the cocoa free, or does George make them pay for each Swiss Miss packet they use? Me, I love driving through Cambridge, Mass with Rush blaring out the car speakers (as long as I drive fast); but how do these fellows justify to their equally woke and crusty neighbors their slavish devotion to Rush 3/5, if not all 24/7? Noise cancelling headphones, I guess.
'Dancing with theCoots'! Brilliant.
I agree that the major Democrat candidates are a bunch of geezers, but I'd like to point out that Trump will be 74 at the time of the election in November. That puts him firmly in the same age bracket as the top Democrat candidates. But to look at him versus the competition you wouldn't know it. Geezer is as geezer does I guess.
If the Democratic Party were a toilet it would have a sign on the stall door announcing, Out Of Order. You can't make this stuff up...on second thought it is all made up.
Just a query Mark. No John Oakley for a while. Holiday break I hope. Loved that 13 minute interview.
He's back on tomorrow, Thomas! Five PM eastern. I can't say what that is in Nunavut Standard Time.
If it wasn't for the revenue we get from selling all our surplus u's to the Commonwealth, America would be bankrupt.
I am beginning to feel a little bad about my schadenfreude for America sticking the Brit Royals with Meghan. Sometimes a joke can just go too far.
Mark's recurring yelps of "Mammy!" leave no doubt who the best guest host might be, undocumented or not. If it wouldn't get me killed, I'd make it my ringtone.
I take personal delight in being a little fraction of the support for the winged Mark Steyn stuff as it flies around the planet! The first marvel is how does Mark do it?! The second is just how much daily content one gets for less than the cost of a postage stamp each day. The third is that I can read what really, really smart and funny Steyn fans all around the planet have to share. It looks like a good time to be a SteynOnline Club member. The Sunday Poems are the finest and The Tales for Our Time feature is the pièce de résistance!
Fran the Fan (not a Man never a Tran)
Slight correction Fran, you can read what really smart and funny Steyn fans around the planet are *allowed* to share. As Mark himself has said, "the opposite of free speech is approved speech". What we have here is approved speech.
Now let's see if you get to read this.
Funny, Steven. There's a little sliver of truth to most all of your comments. I really like that about your comments, kind of like looking for the Easter egg. I almost included a snippy little remark about that but actually free-style commenting for going on nineteen months has taught me that I'm my own worst enemy when it comes to that. They say if you do something for ten thousand hours you become an expert at just about anything you try. I'm only up to about 692 hours and 33 minutes so I've got a long way to go before I can be called expert commenter.
And now I hear that Australian's animal burn victims of the fires need knitted and fabric articles for their skin wounds, I may have to hang up my commenting hat for a spell and take back up with it a little later. The surfing and guitar playing required an ocean and lots of practice. I'm already more advanced in the areas of knitting and sewing than just about anything second only to baking pies and tarts. I've got a bad habit of starting something and losing focus and switching to something else. Commenting here has taught me that I can stick with something longer than I previously believed. Something like a bad combo of OCD and ADD. It must be the intersectionality of two disorders. Oh, did you hear the wombats are sharing their little nesting areas with other species. Isn't that just so sweet? I want to cry thinking about it.
A little sliver of truth to most of my comments? Wow Fran, I haven't felt my head swell like this since Kate said she remembered one of my comments because it was the only worthwhile one I'd made all year. Seriously, you girls need to turn the flattery down a notch.
This is the first time I've laughed so hard at one of your Steyn Club comments the type went all blurry, Steven. (Well, it may also be because I just applied some night time anti-aging cream around my eyes. I think the instructions might've said not to get the cream too close to the eyes but my eyesight is going so I couldn't really read the little typeface printed on the tube. There's a hidden agenda with these eye cream products, the more you use them, the more they creep into your eye sockets and make then burn so the first reaction is to run the eyeballs out of the sockets. Then you need more eye cream to calm them down).
I thought after I sent that you were going to take it the wrong way. My instincts were correct once again! I think I'll go get me a beer.
Aw Frannie, no need to worry. We're buds, aren't we? We've both been yammering on here since the beginning and, at least in my world, good friends zing each other all the time.
In fact, I consider all club members friends who I can have fun with. I have this saying: "any friend of Steyn is a friend of mine." It rhymes!
Yes, Stevie, feels like since the beginning of time. At least for me, ever since Mark Steyn's little light decided to flip on to open up his work and world to the likes of little old nobody me. I can't speak for anyone else but it was like someone scraped the dirt off my molehill and said, "it's safe to come out and play, now"!
Missed the live show, but still laughing 10 minutes ago after reading the opening gambit. Too funny!!
Mark Steyn is to Washington DC what Ricky Gervais is to Hollywood. Looking forward to the actual audio.
They should all take a leaf out of Harvey Weinstein's book and start using zimmer frames.
All this for the glorious prize of coming second in November.
I read today that Bloomberg (isn't he tiny?) addresses the voters by calling himself a Democrat. What will he be if he fails to be nominated? Independent... Can't Buy Me Love.